The Neglected Father

Those Winter Sundays

By Robert Hayden

Sundays too my father got up early 

and put his clothes on in the blueblack cold, 

then with cracked hands that ached 

from labor in the weekday weather made 

banked fires blaze. No one ever thanked him. 

I’d wake and hear the cold splintering, breaking.

When the rooms were warm, he’d call, 

and slowly I would rise and dress, 

fearing the chronic angers of that house, 

Speaking indifferently to him, 

who had driven out the cold 

and polished my good shoes as well. 

What did I know, what did I know 

of love’s austere and lonely offices?

Hayden has crafted a poem that many people could easily relate to. This is a poem with great emotional depth and sadness. It is filled with regret and dismay and brings a certain sorrow to the reader. Hayden manages to fill these three stanzas with a great amount of detail and hidden messages that pull at the heartstrings of any reader. The message of the poem seems to be about more than just a father-son bond, but of the established bonds between families and the understanding of love and what it means to love someone and show them that. 

In the first stanza, Hayden prefaces the poem's purpose and message by taking about his father and how he always woke up early on Sunday mornings to split wood and keep the house warm for his wife and children. He emphasizes the "blueback cold" that his father went outside in and his "cracked hands that ached from labor in the weekday" to show how dedicated his father was to keeping the house warm. Hayden finishes the first stanza by stating, "no one ever thanked him," implying that his father worked outside in the cold with soar, aching hands without being asked or told to; he did it because he loved his family even if they didn't express gratitude towards him for his actions. 

In the next stanza, Hayden writes about what he remembers waking up to in the mornings when his father was outside handling the wood and bringing it inside. He states that he could "hear the cold splintering, breaking," providing detailed imagery and also connecting back to the splintering and breaking of wood to keep the house warm. When stating that he could hear the cold, the reader may begin to picture the creaking of an old house in the cold and the gust of cold air that enters into a home when the door opens. You could also hear the crackling of a fire in the center of the house keeping the rooms and their inhabitants warm. Hayden continues and builds on the passivity of the father by stating that when the house was finally warm, he would call to his children to wake them up. However, he closes this stanza by stating that once he would get out of bed, he feared the "chronic angers of that house," implying that it wasn't always a happy environment and his father was not happy about never being appreciated. 

The final stanza takes a different turn and brings a finalization to the poem. He starts by stating that he spoke indifferently to his father in an attempt to not upset him when he would go downstairs on those frigid Sunday mornings. However, he continues by stating the additional things his father did for him, such as "driv[ing]out the cold and polish[ing] [his] good shoes," that he never showed appreciation for and closes this final stanza and poem all together with a powerful question. It is clear that Hayden regrets taking his father for granted all of his life and that he didn't show love or gratitude towards him. He seems to have come to the realization of just how kind and loving his father was towards him only after his father actually died. 

This poem seems to be about more than just regretting not showing gratitude and affection to one's father before it was too late. With the final two lines in this poem being a question about understanding love and what it truly means, this poem seems more about the understanding and acting out of love towards others. Hayden is expressing his lack of understanding of love and how when he did finally understand its importance, it was too late to show his father love. 

I and Thou, You and Me

"Love Song: I and Thou"
Alan Dugan

Nothing is plumb, level or square:
     the studs are bowed, the joists
are shaky by nature, no piece fits
     any other piece without a gap
or pinch, and bent nails
     dance all over the surfacing
like maggots. By Christ
     I am no carpenter. I built
the roof for myself, the walls
     for myself, the floors
for myself, and got
     hung up in it myself. I
danced with a purple thumb
     at this house-warming, drunk
with my prime whiskey: rage.
     Oh I spat rage's nails
into the frame-up of my work:
     it held. It settled plumb,
level, solid, square and true
     for that one great moment. Then
it screamed and went on through,
     skewing it as wrong the other way.
God damned it. This is hell,
     but I planned it, I sawed it,
I nailed it, and I
     will live in it until it kills me.
I can nail my left palm
     to the left-hand cross-piece but
I can't do everything myself.
     I need a hand to nail the right,
a help, a love, a you, a wife.
--------------------------

According to our textbook, I and Thou is an influential theological book by Martin Buber that states that, "though suffering is inescapable, human life becomes meaningful as man forms 'I-Thou' relationships, as opposed to 'I-It' relationships." This poem follows this idea that, amidst life's confusion and pointlessness, value can be found in relationships with others. The speaker shows his need for the love of his wife through metaphor and allusion, illustrating his confusion and anger at the state of his life and the ironic peace he finds in marriage.

The most prevalent image in the poem is the image of the house and the building of it. The speaker begins by stating that "nothing is plumb, level or square;" he goes on to describe the faults of the house that he has built, ending with the assertion that "[he] is no carpenter" (1-7). By beginning in this way, with a list of all of the shortcomings of his house, he shows himself to be self-deprecating. The house is representative of the speaker's life, and his statement that he is "no carpenter" tells the reader that the speaker does not feel prepare to have responsibility and control his own life. He goes on to say that he built the entire house for himself, "drunk / with [his] prime whiskey: rage" (14-15). He "spat rage's nails / into the frame-up of [his] work: / it held" (16-18). His anger held everything together "for that one great moment" before everything fell apart (20). In his rage, he is throwing this house, or his life, together in the hopes that it will all fit together and give him a home, but it doesn't. He cannot escape from his life, and he vows to "live in it until it kills [him]" (26).

The poem contains several allusions to Jesus Christ. The speaker finds himself different from Jesus in that he is "no carpenter." By exclaiming "By Christ" before this (7), instead of a more traditional "by God," the speaker shows the reader the differences between the speaker and Christ. He also claims that "God damned" his life (23), a stark contrast from the blessing of Jesus. However, at the end of the poem the speaker describes himself nailing his "left palm / to the left-hand cross-piece" (27-28). This is a clear reference to Jesus on the cross; the speaker is trying to show himself as a martyr, but understands that he "can't do everything [him]self. / [He needs] a hand to nail the right, / a help, a love, a you, a wife" (29-31). He can hang himself up in his house by himself (12), but the use of the word "hung" as opposed to "hanged," which would have suggested suicide, shows that his purpose is not to die. The irony that his wife saves him by allowing him to suffer completely and in the way that he wants is clear; she completes his suffering and allows him to find peace in ending of his anger.

This poem twists Buber's initial ideas of "I and Thou," altering the concept to imply that peace can be found in life's misery when one can be assisted in one's pain by another; living in bitterness and upset can become blissful when one finds someone to help complete the pain. The speaker's use of religious allusion, as well as diction that becomes sharpest and most aggressive at the middle of the poem and then eases towards the end as the speaker finds his wife, help to expand on a well-respected idea in order to introduce a new meaning of the idea of companionship.

Everyone Eats

Act 4, Scene 3, Lines 19-35

King:  Now Hamlet, where's Polonius?

Hamlet:  At supper.

King:  At supper where.

Hamlet:  Not where he eats, but where he is eaten.  A certain convocation of politic worms are e'en at him.  Your worm is your only emperor for diet.  We fat all creatures else to fat us, and we fat ourselves for maggots.  Your fat king and your lean beggar is but variable service- two dishes but to one table.  That's the end.

King:  Alas, alas!

Hamlet:  A man may fish with the worm that hath eat of a king and eat of the fish that hath fed of that worm.

King:  What dost thou mean by this?

Hamlet:  Nothing but to show you how a king may go a progress through the guts of a beggar.



When Hamlet refuses to tell Rosencrantz and Guildenstern where he hid Polonius's body,  Claudius summons Hamlet in attempt to coax the temporary resting place out of the stubborn man.  Claudius's efforts turn up futile, as Hamlet is stubborn as a mule and would rather argue semantics than divulge the information to his stepfather/ uncle.  Even though this angers Claudius, Hamlet's tirade on returning to nature states that Polonius's resting place does not matter to him and he has the same apathy towards the life cycle.

Hamlet goes on to discuss how we all eat to be eaten, and he just sped up Polonius's perticular baking time.  Also, the more richly we the people eat, the more richly the decomposers dine, although it does not matter how well we eat because we will all one day become someone else's food.  We "we fat ourselves for maggots" (line 25), or consume to be consumed, which does not have much of a purpose in Hamlet's point of view.  We as a human race tend to ignore this endless cycle, wanting to forget that no matter how we live our lives, we will all be on the same level when we die; we will all become "dishes but to one table" (line 29) and provide similar sustenance to those who feast on flesh.

Hamlet debates the food cycle as a way to circumvent the subject of where Polonius's body lies.  It's not that he does not remember where the body is, it's the principle of witholding the information from Claudius.  Hamlet wants to get at Claudius in any way possible, and enjoys how much this bothers Claudius.  Talking circles is a way to get out of blatantly refusing to share the location, as well as a way to insult Polonius's intelligence.

A Method to her Madness

Ophelia: There's rosemary, that's for remembrance.
Pray you, love, remember. And there is pansies,
that's for thoughts.
Laertes: A document in madness: thoughts and remembrance fitted.
Ophelia: There's fennel for you, and columbines.
There's rue for you, and here's some for me; we
may call it herb-of-grace o' Sundays. You <must> wear
your rue with a difference. There's a daisy. I would
give you violets, but they withered all when
my father died. They say he made a good end.
(4.5.199-209)

    Ophelia seems to have been dealt a poor hand, given Hamlet's hit and run approach to their relationship and his killing of her father. When she finally breaks down, after her father's death, that is, she takes to singing as a form of expression. The songs she sing hold much meaning, as she sings largely of death and loss of innocence. Similarly, the flowers she hands out supposedly to Claudius and Gertrude have deeper meaning as well.
    The first herb she gifts is rosemary. Rosemary, she claims, is for "remembrance." The herb has another important connotation, however. Rosemary is often used to symbolize marriage and fidelity. Obviously, this herb is not going to Claudius or Gertrude. Most likely, it is being handed to Laertes (for remembrance of Polonius) or is intended to convey a message to an absent Hamlet of her love (and his lack thereof).  She then moves on to pansies, "for thoughts." The word pansy was derived from a French word literally meaning "thought" and has been used traditionally for remembrance as well. These pansies are also probably given to Laertes due to her previous choice of rosemary, but because of the more vague connotation, she could be giving them to anyone present.
    After a quick interjection by Laertes, Ophelia moves on to handing out fennel and columbines. Both of these herbs have negative connotations. Fennel is associated with infidelity, but it is also associated with blandishment. With the fennel, she gives concubine: a flower also associated with adultery and deception. Ophelia presumably gifted these to either Claudius of Gertrude, due to their quick and unseemly union. They could, however, also be a representation of Hamlet's faithlessness to her.
    Rue is the next herb Ophelia mentions, and though it is occasionally associated with adultery, it's strongest and most common connotation is that of regret. Rue symbolizes remorse, which is why it is likely handed to Claudius, due to his regret of murdering King Hamlet and taking the throne. It also symbolizes a powerful and lingering sorrow, one that Claudius may never escape for his sins. Ophelia takes some rue for herself as well, but claims Claudius must wear his rue "with a difference." Ophelia is probably wearing rue in regret for the death of her father or of her relationship with Hamlet. This would explain Claudius's difference in wearing the rue, as her motive for gifting it is different. Ophelia also gives a daisy, symbolizing her innocence.
    Lastly, Ophelia mentions violets. Of these, however, she has none to give. She claims they "wilted all" at her father's death. Violets, representing faithfulness, also symbolize love and modesty. These virtues faded, at least in the life of Ophelia, at the death of her father. These flowers all have heavy implications to Ophelia, and they are more than likely meant to convey these messages when looking at the circumstance. There is, to pull on an old saying, a method to her madness.
   

Food for Worms and Maggots

“Not where he eats, but where he is eaten. A certain convocation of politic worms are e’en at him. Your worm is your only emperor for diet. We fat all creatures else to fat us, and we fat ourselves for maggots. Your fat king and your lean beggar is but variable service--two dishes but to one table. That’s the end.” -page 197

In this passage, Hamlet is telling his uncle where Polonius’ body is, in the morbid and convoluted way that we have all come to expect of him. Although all those around him believe that he is insane, these words are actually very wise, and they express two things very clearly: what little power Claudius actually possesses, and what little worth Hamlet sees in life and humanity.

The latter part is obvious: Hamlet believes that all creatures are equal, in that they will all one day be eaten by worms and maggots. “That’s the end” suggests that there is no heaven or hell, only this macabre feast. The fact that worms are mentioned as the “only emperor[s]” brings this point further and alludes that humanity has been put on this planet for one reason, and that is to provide food for worms and maggots.

Why say this to his uncle, instead of to any other character? Simple: Claudius is the definition of a fat king. He eats, drinks, and lives in excess, and he shows little remorse for what he did to be able to do that. He is satisfied with himself, but Hamlet knows better. In the end, according to him, all of his uncle’s power and prestige will be worth nothing but food. As much work as the king may put into feeding “all creatures” for the purpose of feeding himself, he is only feeding maggots. His life, like everyone else’s (in Hamlet’s mind), is practically worthless, and his nephew would never miss an opportunity to remind him, while also revealing his dark worldview a little more clearly.

A Brother's Love

LAERTES:
O heat, dry up my brains! tears seven times salt,
Burn out the sense and virtue of mine eye!
By heaven, thy madness shall be paid by weight,
Till our scale turn the beam. O rose of May!
Dear maid, kind sister, sweet Ophelia!
O heavens! is't possible, a young maid's wits
Should be as mortal as an old man's life?
Nature is fine in love, and where 'tis fine,
It sends some precious instance of itself
After the thing it loves.

     Ophelia has clearly been through an immense amount of stress lately. First, her father forbids her to see the man she loves basically because he says she's not "worthy". Then Hamlet is cruel to her, claims he never loved her, and kills her father.  On top of that, her brother has left her and her father is not buried with the proper ceremony. Ophelia pretty much cracks under all the stress from all the terrible things that have happened to her lately. Also, from the previous scenes between Ophelia, Laertes, and Polonius, the audience gets a clear idea of how controlling Polonius and Laertes are of Ophelia. They basically talk down to her and treat her as a child who is incapable of making her own decisions. However, despite all this, it is made pretty clear that Laertes really does care about his sister and her well-being.
     Laertes comes back to Denmark upon hearing the news of his father's death. As soon as he sees Ophelia in her current state of madness, he becomes very upset and laments the loss of her wits. He wishes that the heat would "dry up [his] brains" and that the salt of his tears would burn sense out of his eyes. He then vows to get revenge for her by saying "thy madness shall be paid by weight". He plans on killing whoever killed his father to get revenge not only for Polonius, but also for Ophelia, since she has gone mad as a consequence of his death. He continues to refer to her tenderly and talks about how moving her madness is. 
     Laertes also comments on the mortality of Ophelia's wits, saying that they were "as mortal as an old man's life". He is basically calling her fragile and weak as an old man. Then he also says that nature deals with love in strange ways. He claims that when something someone loves dies, nature will send "some precious instance of itself after the thing it loves". This means that he is claiming that nature took Ophelia's sanity and sent it away with Polonius because she loved him. 
     This speech as well as Laertes's reactions to Ophelia prove that he really did care about her and tried to do what he thought was right for her. Laertes does try to control Ophelia and tell her what to do. However, he is nothing but kind to her and laments at her madness. He had good intentions, but he went about executing them wrong.

You Know, If You Really Loved Me

“Claudius: Not that I think you did not love your father

But that I know love is begun by time,

And that I see, in passages of proof,

Time qualifies the spark and fire of it.

There lives within the very flame of love

A kind of wick or snuff that will abate it.

And nothing is at a like goodness still.

For goodness, growing to a pleurisy,

Dies in his own too-much. That we would do,

We should do when we would, for this “would” changes

And hath abatements and delays as many

As there are tongues, are hands, are accidents.

And then this “should” is like a spendthrift sigh

That hurts by easing.—But to the quick of th' ulcer:

Hamlet comes back. What would you undertake

To show yourself in deed your father’s son

More than in words?

Laertes:  To cut his throat i' th' church.”

Page 231

With death being a constant figure in Hamlet, it would make sense that mourning would shadow behind it. In this passage, Claudius takes advantage of Laertes’s grievance as persuasion to work with him against Hamlet. We also see a return of the son being expected to revenge his father and kill his father’s murder. The King’s sudden change in view on the proper duration for mourning shows his manipulative character and his lack of true empathy toward others.

In the beginning of the play, Claudius gave an entire speech to Hamlet about how death happens to everyone and at some point you are expected to move on. He complained that Hamlet was grieving too much and that it seemed childish and immature. However, suddenly now when Laertes’s sadness could prove beneficial, Claudius begins talking about how Laertes’s seems to recover too quickly from his father’s death and isn’t showing true love or sympathy to him. He uses a metaphor of candles with “There lives within the very flame of love a kind of wick or snuff that will abate it.” Using a candle makes his love seem fragile to begin with, as they can extinguish with a small breeze rather than comparing it to a large fire as love sometimes is. Then he goes on to say that time could be the cause of its extinguish, as if that is a crime rather than a good thing as he had been preaching to Hamlet. Claudius also begins his statement with “Not that I think you did not love your father” which implies that he thinks the opposite. He then antagonizes Laertes by saying he doesn’t have the courage to defend his father’s memory with “show yourself in deed your father’s son more than in words?” All of his statements are carefully worded to manipulate Laertes’s into getting angry at Hamlet and acting out his own revenge.

Claudius displays his lack of empathy through his careless use of other people’s emotions and his inability to properly mourn. Though I’m sure Claudius might have found him annoying, Polonius was close with him in some ways. However, at the time of his death, he is not expressing any mourning at all. Instead, he uses Polonius’s death to his advantage. He shows no remorse in abusing Polonius’s memory by warping his son’s grievance into  a weapon. Claudius also doesn’t believe in what he is telling Laertes, as shown by his contradictory speech to Hamlet. He doesn’t truly think that a person needs to mourn death very long. Other people’s emotions are a viewed as a tool by Claudius rather than something to sympathize with.

In plotting Hamlet’s murder, Claudius reveals his manipulativeness and heartlessness. He shows that he does not grieve and is willing to use sensitive topics like a father’s death to convince people to work with him. He uses specific wording to goad Laertes in a way that would make it seem that he is dishonoring his father’s memory if he doesn’t help him. Through his ability to argue the complete opposite of what he told Hamlet , and in doing so using people’s emotions in a way others would avoid, Claudius shows that his character is even more corrupt than previously thought.