Reading Between the Lines

Passage (p. 46): "As yet I had spoken to no one, nor did anybody seem to take notice of me; I stood lonely enough: but to that feeling of isolation I was accustomed; it did not oppress me much. I leant against a pillar of the verandah, drew my grey mantle close about me, and, trying to forget the cold which nipped me without, and the unsatisfied hunger which gnawed me within, delivered myself up to the employment of watching and thinking. My reflections were too undefined and fragmentary to merit record: I hardly knew where I was; Gateshead and my past life seemed floated away to immeasurable distance; the present was vague and strange, and of the future I could form no conjecture."

This passage's main motif is loneliness. Jane expresses straight forward, true feeling loneliness. She admits that she "had spoken to no one", which is the reason for not making friends and contributes to being lonely. However, on the other side, Jane is "accustomed" to "that feeling of isolation" because of her time with the Reeds. That is why it does not "oppress" her. When the Reeds did not take notice of Jane, it was her time of peace, so being left alone, instead of being harassed is actually a novelty for her. Jane "[draws her] grey mantle close about [her]" and thus in a way is shielding herself from not only the cold, but from others. Wrapping the coat around herself gives a sense of self comfort she does not even know she needs. Jane has physical "unsatisfied hunger" that "gnawed [her] within", but the hunger is also metaphorical. The "unsatisfied hunger" Jane has is the hunger for emotional connections, friends, knowledge, and self peace. All of those things she needs gnaw at her. The absence of self peace is evident as her later self notes her "reflections were too undefined and fragmentary to merit record". Jane does not think her musings are worth remembering. They had no "merit" meaning she feels her thoughts are unimportant. Though Jane "hardly knew where [she] was" somehow she could mentally imagine her "past life float[ing] away" from wherever she perceived herself to be. The "immeasurable distance" implies completely forgetting it and putting everything she knows to the farthest back of her mind it can go. She wants to focus on the present, but it is "vague and strange". It is "vague" because she is unaware of how her new life works. It is "strange" because all around her girls seem to know what they are doing and always falling obediently into line. Finally, as the passage comes to an end, Jane, in an organized manner, ends her reflections on her future. "Of the future [she] could form no conjecture" because her past is gone from her now an "immeasurable distance" away and her present is too "vague" to understand. With a past and present such as that, it is understandable she is unsure of her future. The passage fits in with the rest of novel as Jane tries to come to terms with how she was treated in the past and what will become of her future. It also is important for recognizing Jane's own thoughts on her musings, and how she does not see the deep thoughtfulness of them.